The father I admire
by Risikatigeress
Summary: Joshua's life with Aion, plus the admiration from a young demon and his constant battle against the worst sinner of all: himself


The Father I Admire By: Risika 

_**AN: **First I'd like to declare I do not own Chrno Crusade nor any of their inspiring characters. Secondly, my friend, whom you know as Le-chan, I dedicate this to her. She has always taught me to fight for the best that I deserve and nothing less. I'm not so religious as her, but if I have to believe in anything I will believe in her ability as a writer and her constant pushing of Chrno Crusade onto me that I just had to write this, in fact the idea came to me, while in company . And thirdly Joshua may seem out of character, but I put him inside his mind based off his older self in the anime. I just felt the way he always looked so sorrowful, there had to be something going on between him and Aion, to keep him surviving. Anywho, this is my first attempt at a fanfic, so I hope you enjoy!_

Her smiling face, I close my eyes and try to visualize. I find only darkness, like this room. It's useless, I knew this would happen, like so many other times before, yet I still try. I'm forgetting the sound of her laugh, the delight in her eyes, but she was never smiling at me. It was **_him_** that kept her smiling, even now. It's all his fault this happened, I wish we had never arrived at that grave, it was punishment for all his sins, we should of left him alone. But it wasn't in your nature. Small and innocent, you held out both hands with warming comfort. Gentle, it was your way. But now it's gone, he took it from you, us. If it weren't for him, we would and those children at the Seventh Bell would still be laughing and ruining your laundry as you chased each one down to receive ample punishment for their wrongs toward you, but want does he get? Your warmth and smile and joy that you bring to everyday, he will one day come to claim it all, for himself. His evil stole me away, the children, and now you, why couldn't I be that one, to stand beside you and fight, I'm weak, I have always been this way, but as one of God's right hand, I will seek my vengeance, even if you no longer stand among us. I will take his life, and make that devil pay for how he has wronged us both, but you most of all, my dear onesan.

Chapter 1: Redemption

"Joshua!" A high-pitched voice called from the hall, and a short woman dressed in overalls and a white tee walked in the room.

"Onesan?" I turned in high hopes, the room had become brighter in that instant, but it was only a shortcoming. The woman that stood before me was clearly not Rosette and I knew to whom was at fault for this disgusting sight. The woman was only dressed to look like a younger form of my sister, some sick idea of a child dress-up game: Aion. "Do I look simple minded to you," I asked, not bothering to hide my disapproval.

"But Josh-" she began, but I knew I wasn't prepared to hear what explanation she had for this act of foolishness. Then I noticed it, what hung down from her ears and rested on her shoulders, blonde. It was clearly a wig, but he had gone too far this time.

My anger boiled and I said the only thing I could think of to settle this. "I thought Aion told you, you will refer to me as Lord Joshua. There are only two allowed to voice my name in such a manner and you, my lady, are not one of them." I huffed. I was not usually this bold, but for whatever reason, Aion was attempting to trigger a reaction from my seeing Rosette again and using Fiore as the bait. I knew she could never replace her, or even begin to understand our bond, no matter how much she cared for me, the woman could never substitute Rosette.

"Forgive me, Lord Joshua, I did not mean to cause an upset, I was merely--" Fiore did not finish her statement before I placed two fingers upon her lips, in order to silence. She looked up at me then, with heartfelt eyes and I knew that if Aion had not put her up to this, she would not have acted so robust.

So I would not hold this against her, but I could not help, but show some annoyance, "you've got to work on your people skills." I sighed, not knowing her past; I made a mere judgement. "Now tell me what you came to say." I smiled; it had not been so long ago that I would have given Rosette that same reassuring smile.

"My lord," she spoke gently, "Aion wishes for your presence in the study." She bowed her blonde head and moved away from the door.

I proceeded in front of her, and moved my hand along her face, but she did not twitch as I had seen her do so, with Aion. She pressed her cheek to rub against my palm, but her touch was not as pleasing as I thought it should. Her fingers was warm, but I did not feel their sensation, only a cold chill through my head. I abruptly pushed away; removing the wig and letting her natural hair fall to its length. She looked at me with a sorrowful gaze. "I would have figured as much," and I left the woman to her thoughts. I would orate this issue no further with her, I did not wish to speak out of tongue. After all she was the one who cared for me, and helped me when I was laid up in bed. The noises are calmer now and I'm not as weak as I had been. So perhaps what Aion did, was doing me a favor, but lately, his "favors" were unwanted and anything but amusing. I continued past the kitchen, my frustration building with every step I took, getting closer to Aion's study. He spent most of his Sundays there reading. It was no surprise that he was there now. The man sat quietly, staring out the doorway, expecting me as usual. This pissed me off further. He sat there with a light smirk and in his usual attire, of white, but he was no angel.

"You were dreaming again," he spoke in a hushed voice, as if he knew something I didn't, but I didn't give him the pride of knowing he did. I didn't have to.

"I dream every night." I responded coldly, "mostly nightmares."

"Does she frighten you that much," he queried, "Rosette, I mean?" His words took me by surprise, but I continued not to falter in my threatening glare.

He kept his smirk firm, " My, aren't me feisty." Words like poison to anyone who was not used to his demeanor. I began to wonder if it was this that made Chrno loose faith in his friend, the demon was now much weaker than I. I enjoyed the idea and savored the moment when I could kill him myself and take back what was rightfully mine. We continued to stare in silence, like two stubborn children we sat there, unwilling to break. He finally gave way and eased up on his expression. He lifted from his chair and stood beside me with one hand on my shoulder.

"You wanted to see her, so I brought you her image," he sighed sincerely, in his own defense, "it was the least I could do." I felt his earnest in every chill that ran down my back as he lifted his palm off my collarbone.

I turned to face him, with grimace, "I do not wish to see her yet," he raised a brow in a slight confusion at the sudden clarity. "I could not stand for her to see me as I am now, but I will destroy the sinner, they call Chrno and remove all doubt that he is the true devil of this realm. I will become stronger and worthy of the title, her brother. We will realize both our dreams and in doing so we can live together as a family, right Aion, freedom is what you will grant us, right uncle?" Only a nod, in response, before he left my side and then the room, muttering words I could not quite make out, but I was sure they were words of concurrence. Leaving me all alone once more. That was the last time I ever saw my sister like that.

**_AN: _**And thus concluding chapter 1, I hope you liked this small tid-bit and please let me know what you thought! REVIEW! Sorry if the grammar is off a bit, but I am far from being a great writer, so go easy on me ;;; but I do hope you like it and will be asking for more.


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